Pagans Celebrate eBay Policy Changes, Deals on Vintage Toys

Actual item listing on eBay

Pagans throughout the country showed their appreciation for internet auction house and ecommerce site eBay this week in response to the company's announcement that they would be discontinuing the sale of spells, psychic readings and dieting advice starting in September.

The reason for the policy change, eBay states in their 2012 Fall Seller Update, is that "[t]ransactions in these categories often result in issues between the buyer and seller that are difficult to resolve." The company hopes that by disallowing the sale of intangible items of questionable value, it can reduce cases of fraud and help to build confidence in the marketplace. Said one eBay representative, "Making sure our customers get what they pay for is a top priority for us. When people come to eBay ready to spend thousands of dollars on a 1998 collectable Queen of the Prom Barbie doll, we want them to know that they're not just throwing their money away on a scam."

The Pagan reaction to this news was largely positive, applauding the company's decision and welcoming the chance to distance themselves from disreputable con artists that threaten Paganism's reputation as a diverse religious community of intelligent, level-headed individuals committed to putting community service and support above personal profit. "I think it was definitely the right decision," said Raven Moonbeam, 27, a Wiccan priestess from Alabama. "It's embarrassing to go on eBay and see how many people are selling spells that promise instant riches, or werewolf transformation powers, or penis enlargements. It's worse than email spam!"

"That's not what my religion is about," she added. "And besides, everyone knows that werewolf transformation is not something you can just auction off to the highest bidder. It takes years of training."

Pagan eBay seller Sirius, 40, believes the policy change will actually improve his sales on the ecommerce site, pointing out that with the reduction in fraudulent listings, his legitimate listings will be easier to find. "Instead of customers having to wade through fifteen pages of crap to find my products, they'll only have to wade through four or five." Sirius uses eBay to sell hand-carved wands, staves, authentic renaissance-style apparel and refurbished laptops.

Not all Pagans are happy about the news, however. One eBay seller directly affected by the policy change expressed his dismay in an email, saying, "MAGIC SPELL***FIGHT INJUSTICE***DESTROY YOUR ENEMIES X10 power bonus penis enlargement potion free shipping."

In related news, handicrafts online marketplace Etsy also announced policy changes this week, stating that after "several months extensively researching some offbeat and fascinating topics, from issues surrounding the sale of human bones to the corrosive and toxic properties of mercury" they have decided to prohibit sellers from making medical drug claims about sale items. Herbalists already familiar with FDA regulations regarding unsubstantiated medical claims for products that are ingested or applied to the body were completely unsurprised by this policy update.